You were taught many things when you were young. Some of those things you accepted easily, others you fought for a while. Eventually you caved under the repetition of sameness, you fully joined your tribe.
You joined many tribes. The familiar process, voluntary or involuntary, repeats itself. You find enough in a new tribe to draw you in, then you surrender to demands your soul rebels against, because you must belong.
Did I say soul?
You are unique. “Soul” is a good word for that inner part of you that demands to be heard and shared. That part of you that you’ve learned to squelch so you can calmly join a herd. That is not a problem if you want to live life on terms dictated by the cow that wears the bell. Most never realize the lead cow is itself lead by others — those that guide with an eye to their own benefit, not the herd’s benefit, certainly not to individual bovine benefit.
Our world has come a long way from the middle ages when everything was viewed through the lens of of allegory. We now focus almost exclusively on what rather than why. It’s a distraction.
CS Lewis said it well, “You do not have a soul, you are a soul that has a body.”
Why is a personal quest. Personal quests are more than discouraged, they are resisted. We are encouraged to surrender to society for the benefit of all. It does not have to be reasonable.
ie: We give our early lives to prepare for a secure future that is anything but secure. We’ve been taught to squelch the questions we would naturally raise at such a requirement. If at graduation we did not find a niche that we had trained for, we acquired more training. Something was supposedly missing from us if society didn’t reward our obedience.
Obedience was the drover’s goal, our following of the lead cow. The drovers were not seeking our success but our compliance with herd doctrine. If they drove us through a desert on the way to cattle pens outsider a slaughter house, we did not allow ourselves questions — we were following the cow bell — all is as it’s supposed to be. We might be thrown some hay, some will perish along the way, but on our course we will stay. A litany sung to quiet the herd of citizens.
Just as when reason argued against allegory; history has reached a turning point. Irrational reasonings by a few have become a rationalization tool. Arguments are decided by who shouts this phrase loudest: “It’s proven science.” Counter arguments are mocked, questioning is blackballed, volume and numbers carry the day.
Frequently the one is right. The person everyone mocks. The one the herd ignores.
Except for you. You are a soul. You have questions. You’re not willing to sublimate your being to the sounds of a cowbell. It’s time to leave the herd. But you don’t want to live alone, you want to belong with a family or tribe of individuals that recognize your individuality –even when you are most irritating. That means you’ll have to return to a younger you, the one that asked questions instead of following authority. You will have to give up that huge herd and join many small enclaves that share your intrinsic interests. The Internet is a good place to search for your compatriots.
You will change. More than the world is changing, you will change. Your change will not be from abandonment, it will be one of restoration. Acknowledge the fact that you are living according to your own rules. You’ve had to pretend to obey, but that need is no longer present. Freedom is doing what you want.
With a mature mind;
you can now be
what as a child you dreamed you would be.
Anything.
Since we talked about your soul let’s talk ethics. Do what you say you will do, unless someone else materially changes the rules. Play nice, don’t aggress. Pursue your dreams, become the best you can be, others will naturally benefit.
Ethics are actually all about you living with yourself. If it’s for you, why not do your best?
Quit the massive herds assembled by others for their benefit. Find your own grazing lands with those that share your ever broadening world view. Become a citizen in a country of your own making.
Bill Freeman